by the fans for the fans

Lynn. You know my feelings about posts like these, and you know this is just a repeat to what I've said elsewhere in the past.

You have been quite strong, focused and possitive about this illness. I know you are scared, and so am I. Those odds are stupid, they are meaningless and do not exist. You have the willpower to make a 100% recovery. The infection will pass, the drugs will work, and you'll not lapse into kidney failure.

But even if you did, the outstanding practices, care and abilities will mean you'll still lead a prosperous life, fighting and wining the future battles it may bring.

I have known you on-and-off for what, nearly a decade probably from the time you waltz into rt.com. The past 2-3 almost years we have been pretty solid and close, and the past few months have been some of the best times I've had in life. It touched my heart to know you would come to me, 3000+ miles away, to talk about serious problems, before talking to people living just feet from you. We both have that special place in our hearts for each other, and have supported each other beyond the normal ties of friendship.

Sure we joke around a lot, but you know. regardless, I want you and the world to know that you were loved so mcuh by someone like me, and yeah no matter how long or short the future maybe, I want that future for the both of us, together.

I often feel that I never say this enough to you, but I love you so very much from the deep of my heart. This day next year I want you to be happy, celebrating, sitting next to me in my arms. =]

[post deleted]

ignore the previous post by that dimwit kid with NO life
anyways............

Thanks guys for your uplifting words =]
it really means a lot to me. I hope I didn't go too into detail about things, but I just wanted to explain what was going on with me, but again thanks
I will stay positive =]

Still waiting for my publisher to get back to me about the cover image, so as soon as I get the word, I'll post it. I actually do have a sample picture of it, but its the first proof and they misspelled my name which is silly but oh well.

health wise, I'm having ups and downs, poor circulation in my legs, but I don't know if the medication is causing that........among other things. I'm staying positive though, even a lot of stressful things have been going on lately.

Also I want to apologize to those of you that have been harassed on Classic, the offending accounts have been deactivated and the registration is now by admin approval only.
They harassed me via posts and PM's and I've got all the IP addresses, so if anyone else that is a member there has been harassed via PM let me know. (you can also expect a big announcement on the site)

with that aside im going to work on some promotional stuff and I'll be sure to post it here when its finished =]
hope everyone has a good day, oh and please say a prayer for me? Thanks =]

~Lynn~

Thats good to hear about the book stuff..

As for health, from my perspective, although you have had a few ups and downs, you doo seem to be feeling, or at least sounding better. As for the bad circulation. Amoxycillin can cause medical colitis as a standard side effect. inflames the gutt/intestines, etc, and can cause a lower rate of circulation in the legs. Its why they tell you to take it easy and rest more then the usual 'cillins.

Praying day and night for you =]

As for the spam. Shit happens, people take things too far. Its sorted now, its dealt with. Hopefully no more instances like that will happen regardless of the people/persons targeted.

Let me know when I can get a copy. If you have to hit me with a private message...please do. can't wait

sure thing guys as soon as I know the details I will post them.

Also this Monday I go back to the Doctors so I'll get an update of things, refill of my prescription and probably more shots........which I am not looking forward to.

But among other things I've been dealing with a recent bad break up that's left me more dead inside than I've ever been in my entire life, but that happens right?

But I have to say that I'm glad he no longer wants me in his life because I feel the same. He used me, lied to me and broke every promise he ever made, and with that I have to say I regret EVERYTHING, I regret ever knowing him.......
and I should have kicked him out of my life when he attempted to run back, shame I didn't.

Lesson learned though right? NEVER give up your life for another person, especially if they aren't worth it.
Tell them to fuck off and be done with it.

So a BIG thank you to him for doing me the biggest fucking favor in the world!

I wait with a heavy heart and anticipation that the news from your Dr. apointment is good, better, and stronger.

As for the break up. I am happy that you have come to that choice, that you have realised what you needed to do.

I have to apologuise Lynn. Last year I was unwell, withdrawn, and not there to help you. I should have prevented that relationship to start in the first place. I knew that guy, I had my doubts, my concerns, and yeah these past few months, now that I have learned EVERYTHING, it breaks my heart to know I was right, and in some way my fault.

I realised then, our friendship, I actually feared he would drive you away with his need to protect his childish personas. Thats when I realised the person I had been looking for all these years was actually sitting in front of me. It was you.

I've made my promises. I wouldn't cheat on you, I wouldnt use you. I couldn't bear the thought of just discarding you like trash. I promise to help you every step of the way. Your illnesses, I know them, I understand them, I know how they can effect you and even others around you. I've taken the time to not read, but to ask, the actual professionals, so I can better help better understand you and love you the way you should.

You sacrificed your whole life in order to try for a relationship which became your demon, your void. Its about time someone sacrificed their life, their existence, to show you, there is better, I am better.

I give you the gift of reality, truth, trust, loyalty, family, honesty, and above all my love. People can say whatever they like about me, they only know half of me at best, but you are the only one who knows the real me, and thats all I ever want.

Lynn. I love you with all that I am and all that I have. I'll promise, that 2012, sometime in that year, you last name will be mine, for eternity, in marriage, and one day beyond that, who knows, maybe my trust and dedication for you culminates into our very own child. I first said it months ago, that I would never abandon you. That fact is ture. The only way I would is through my own death. I'll live and die for you.

you really have no idea how speechless your post has left me, those are some of the kindest, sweetest, caring words I've heard in a long time. I know things have been difficult lately, even scary at times but I want you to know that your words made me smile, also something I haven't done in a long while.....
But it means a lot to me that you've been there for me, trying to help me cope with what I'm going through, both the illness and my emotional pain. I can see now that you really do care.......and more than he ever did. Sad thing is I believe I meant more to him when I belonged to someone else, and that's probably the truth. He'll never realize how much I did love and care for him........how things that others would consider trivial, mattered a lot to me, because they were important to him. I always protected him, always encouraged him, always believed in him, and in the effort........I followed my heart despite being hurt once before, unsure of whether to trust him again, then later on feeling betrayed because he couldn't even keep simple promises......so I became bitter and that bitterness just escalated, and soon there was nothing but fighting, the real reason always buried because I didn't feel I could talk to him anymore, but whatever. What's done is done, maybe some day he'll realize what he had, or maybe not, probably not........oh well. All I can say was love just wasn't enough, never felt appreciated always felt pushed aside, living with those broken promises as if everything I had been told before was a lie to lure me in, and once he had me that was it. But that's life.............people come, people go, they will lead you to your highest low.

Just better to forgive and forget as I always say...........and long ago we used to have a song..........but that song has been replaced, with this one

I'll always be sorry for what I did and the things I said, but I will never forget that he abandoned me..........
and I may have not handled things all that great when I left............but at least I didn't leave a suffering animal behind to die.

This all just feels like a publicity stunt to me. A Robotech forum is probably not the best place to air your personal dirty laundry.